Echoes.

Ah, I love Valentine’s Day.
Well.
No, I don’t.
But with my husband in Minneapolis, I’m not subjecting to much of the pink and red stuff.

In fact, the only thing good about Valentine’s Day is the guaranteed flowers.  I LOVE getting flowers.  LOVE.  And cards.  But Nick hasn’t quite picked up on the fact that getting a card – A real card – means way more than a gift does to me (hint.) and so we’re still working on that one.

This V-day didn’t bring flowers though – no, it wasn’t giftless.  Nick’s very aware of the date – he likes the holiday!  Go figure!  But the gift was unusual even for him and that makes it neat in its own way.

As for Nick, I bought him a coffee gift card.
That sounds lame, I know.
But anything electronic or hobby-ish he’d prefer to pick out himself and doesn’t tend to hold back on buying.  He’s pretty stocked on clothes – way more than me at the moment – and his only real activity, other than racquetball and gaming, is drinking coffee. 
It’s his new addiction – and Caribou is feeding it nicely.  Now, I’m helping Caribou along and my thrifty husband will be enjoying coffee for at least a week or two on someone else’s dime.
For him, that’s a win-win.

I won’t say the day wasn’t depressing in a way.
Now that we’re married I’m quickly heading towards devastated that we aren’t together yet.  But.  
I’m still counting my blessings – and there are many.

Not enjoying much of Fat Tuesday – never do.
Though this year I think I’m going to try the mother of all sacrifices for Lent.
SODA.
I know.
I wasn’t sure about putting it in print.  This would take more willpower than I’ve ever shown towards anything in my life.  So.  I don’t want to put it in print and have people nag me about it.
But.  I’m thinking this may be the real deal – the big attempt.
I don’t want to.  Who wants to give up their addictions?
But I will.  I can.  If I just say it often enough.

Now, if my husband would give up internet gaming we’d be at full sacrifice mode.  But he isn’t likely to do so – I don’t think the symbolism means much to him.

But.  I’m growing in some ways that I never expected and it’s become important to me for me to make a Real Gesture.  Not just for myself or my faith, but for other people as well.   And for the me that I’m becoming.

The notion that I get to choose what I go without doesn’t sit well with me, especially when I think of those in Haiti and what change this path month has brought to their lives.  People all over the world are sacrificing things that I take for granted and the notion that I am so incredibly lucky that I’ve been able to have a chance to become addicted to something as soda – when so many can’t even get clean drinking water – well… that’s pathetic.

I need this, I think, to teach me about taking material things for granted and to help me get in touch with my lost willpower.
Such a small thing to symbolize so much, I suppose.
It may even sound stupid.
But it’s a start.
And it’s definitely much harder than it sounds. 
I currently drink a little over a gallon of water a day, two gallons of milk a week and soda every day.  I’m like a camel with a liquid fetish.

So, this is Big for me.  And some people may not survive my attempt.  (She says as she takes a swig of her Coke.)

Ah yes.  This next month or so should be interesting.
Pray for my family.