Runneth over.
January 22, 2010
I don’t talk about this much.
Not out loud.
I lost a friend during my wedding.
It started long before the actual official losing and I’m still not sure why.
I lost someone I love very much, who knows me about as well as anyone.
I hurt that person unintentionally during my busy day and for that I’m incredibly sorry.
The reason behind the hurt makes sense logically and emotionally but the continuation and holding on to that hurt/anger does not.
So. That hurts too – that it seems such a small thing to throw away a friendship that has lasted more than half of my life.
That I’d hoped that person would know that I would sooner step in front of a bus than hurt her intentionally.
That that doesn’t matter stings.
Right now that person apparently has some changes going on in her life.
They’re not mine to speak of, but knowing that she neither cares nor wants to hear from me seems. Wrong.
It hurts.
So, I’ll say here, because I can’t say it anywhere else.
I love you, Les.
I love you like a sister.
I’m so glad that these changes in your life are bringing about happy things and that events in your life are happening that you never really thought would.
I wish all of you – the entire lot of you – the very best.
And I hope you know that no matter what, you can always come to me.
I’m sorry friend! I hope one day you guys can patch things up and get back to being whatever it was you were before. I hope your friend can get past the hurt and she doesn’t let it eat at her. Because that’s no fun either.
Both sides are no bueno!
Maybe one day Leslie will come around. I am sorry, Even though I don’t know what happened, I know it hurts you deeply that this rift exists. ((HUGS)))