Echoes.

My having run out of meds is hitting hard today, as the nerves of this all gang up on me.
I can’t afford the meds, really… I’m totally broke on one hand and trying to deal with inflated summer energy/gas/spending bills.
It doesn’t help that I have absolutely no control over the family purse strings – this long distance separation means that I have barely any recourse.
And Nick’s quite the control freak when it comes to money.
Not a bad thing – a good thing, but he doesn’t have the list in front of him of things remaining to do and I do.
It’s massive.
Huge.

And all has to be done in the last two weekends I have free. 
THIS one and one in September.
And then I get married.
That’s all I have free.
And he seems to think I need to be okay with waiting.
Because he doesn’t want to take money out of savings.
And I get that.
But the wedding planning can’t be based around our paydays – some weeks need more, some need less – which is how we end up with the rest in savings anyway…
AND is why we’re saving?

Bah.
Yes.  Everything costs more than originally planned.
I can’t explain that logically, except that – well.  When I’m nuts, life turns nuts.
And when life turns nuts, it makes me more nuts.
And when I’m more nuts, I don’t plan as well as I should.
And I’m not a bargain shopper to begin with.
That’s not to say I don’t have bargains.
Just that I’m annoyed I had to shop for them.

And being in the mood I am today – with everything hitting hard.
Well.
Annoyances multiply.