Echoes.

I want to apologize to most everyone whose wedding I’ve been in in the past few years. I’ve been a lag.
I didn’t realize how much simple things can make you feel like no one cares.

My mother in law has two showers and a lingerie party set up for me already – not one person in MY family or among my friends has even mentioned throwing me a shower.
Or asked about our wedding plans.
I guess my family has fallen further than I thought.

And it has nothing to do with gifts.
To be honest, mostly I just registered for things I wanted – things I’ll never purchase myself – but our marriage isn’t about that.
Krista has been kicking herself into gear overtime online working with me to help find the best shoe, the best favor, the best anything…
Leslie and Laura went shoe shopping with me without a murmur of criticism for anything I made them try on – even if they HATED it.

But the family? Not a word.
How odd is that?

And I remember those days when I’d half ass help with a shower – because I was so into my own life – and that’s not a BAD thing. But I admit I never really thought that my cooperation was that big of a deal.
I helped when asked – but I have a hard time remembering a time when I helped when I WASN’T asked.
And that, my friends, is what has me ashamed.

These are people that I love dearly, that asked me to stand up next to them, that went through this stress quite happily – and when I think of all the little ways I could have helped ease the weight, I wish I could go back in time.
No, it wouldn’t make them less married or less happy or less anything – but I would love to let them know in hindsight just how happy I was for them, just how selfish I was in focusing on myself and just how much I wished I had made their day just a little more weightless.

Ah, that 20/20.